Today I walked to the gym at my apartment complex under the cover of dawn. I thought as I walked. I really should do some peck exercises today. I regularly do a full range of different things in the gym to try and keep my body in shape. Ive always had this thing where my abs were more important than my pecks. Feel like I need to keep my core going to keep my body mobile.

As I pull the weights this way and that with my arms I could feel my pectoralis muscles flex and tighten. Mostly a calming warmth but building to a burn at the top of my reps. As I stopped to breathe I found myself wondering why I was working out my pecks. Some might say well obviously to keep your arms strong. Or even to balance my rippling abs with my miniscule pecks. Personally I came to the conclusion it was the later. Was I supposed to build my pecks bigger for a reason? Regardless of why my mind convinced me to focus on my pecks the actions in general had me thinking. Why are we all in the gyms across the US?

We go about our daily lives taking actions and accomplishing everything we need. This should be enough to keep our bodies in shape. The muscles I use every day are the muscles I need strong. This should develop us into the beings for which we are striving. By going to the gym I am instead keeping my body in a balanced state. I am attempting to be fully capable and useful in every situation. Isn’t this fighting my nature as a human?

The way we have evolved to the humans we are today is by developing certain traits that further our survival or help make us specifically better at certain tasks. We developed opposable thumbs be cause it helped us manipulate objects. This made it easier to eat and perform daily tasks. I wonder if there was a group of primates that so intensely worked on doing things the same way that they never developed these useful traits and it never moved on to their offspring. I think there were and today we call them primates. They didn’t evolve, they are still doing things the way they always have. By focusing on building and fortifying muscles and body parts we don’t regularly use we may be preventing development of our future beings.

As many types of human beings with many different focus points and physical abilities arise we are already becoming highly diversified. This diversifying is spreading us to many different types of humans. Certain people are good at certain things and horrible at others. Short guys are inherently worse at basketball than hide and seek. Depending upon what you spend your time doing you may develop traits that your offspring will inherit.

By keeping my body balanced its a sure thing I won’t be a gymnast or a distance runner without a lot of training and adjustment.Though it is possible to change. Its also sure I won’t be a fat couch potato or a sumo wrestler. However the traits I most intensely focus and work on will be transmitted in seed to my offspring as well as imprinted visually as they grow. Thus creating another being with similar traits. Our society allows for freedom though.

Once the offspring are 15-18 years old they will begin their own journey and focus. If they keep the same path as I they could become highly similar and skilled in the same traits. Same goes for some one with an intense focus on huge muscles or certain specific skills. As this goes on there could be larger and larger diversities in peoples strengths and weaknesses. This could separate us into whole new categories of beings. This of course leaves out an entire different important argument of mental acuities.

This is just what was on my mind this morning. Being whole and balanced may be prolonging your evolution. You will not follow a path but rather be a base model human. This leaves you behind and puts you in closer comparison of base human to evolved human much like current human to primate.

Today as I sit on a patio eating lunch in 84° weather. Beautiful Las Vegas although the 45 mph wind gusts have me thinking. A lot of me has blown away. Change is so constant and I have seen a lot of it.

I originally started this blog in 2007. I posted anything and everything. My intention was to have a way to track my personal development and share it with others. I had fun and posted sometimes once or twice a week. Eventually the posts tailed off and I felt like I had identified the blog as something that no longer resonated with me. I was tired of sharing the personal details and having little or no response. I redefined the blog for myself and publicly. I just posted creative insights and stories that came to me. The posts became more sparse. As time went on the idea I had in my mind for the blog stopped resonating with me. I continuously felt “I should write about this” Then it would be immediately followed by “Its not what I want on my blog” That would be my excuse for not writing about stuff.

I may have had a good thought or a creative story but it would pass without being expressed. Ive spent more and more time expressing myself via Reblogs on Tumblr, Retweets on Twitter, and Status updates on Facebook. These formats are great and all but I feel like I’m lacking a creative outlet by painting my blog into a box. I love sharing the quick hits of the best stuff I find on the net but somehow it doesn’t fill that spot I have for creativity. Ive decided to let this blog be a open place again. I want to put up anything I feel. Make this a place where people can come to see whats going on with me. I’m not going to try to keep things in a specific style or hold back stuff in name of taste or usefulness.

That being said, Long ago I moved through a period of materialism. A time where I identified myself by what I had. Consuming products left and right. Making sure I had the newest coolest best stuff out there. Once this was behind me many things blew away with it. I left behind TV and Video games as well as Poker and gambling in general. Most of these things were huge time sucks. Taking away from “Living”. All that gone I floundered for the past couple years wondering where to devote my new found time. Many things changed. Ive left more things behind and added new things to my life. Im a new better person.

Today I realized that I am still a consumer. A consumer of content. I munch down youtube videos 15-30 a day. I lap up articles on the net 5-10 in the course of an afternoon. Even more I peruse tumblr and twitter every few hours for the best morsels of goodness around. Movies, videos, words, books, status updates, reblogs, pictures. All this information out there and we are all eatin it up these days. I want to post my thoughts and be my own sort of content creator. Hopefully I can offer a few snacks.

Lately when I’m truly happy I don’t have that much to type here. I spend more time doing and experiencing than thinking and writing. Put a posting app on my phone. Maybe i’ll be inspired to write more on the go. No guarantees. Peace and Love.

Most of you know I’ve got a new girlfriend. Many of you may also know I just attended a men’s group meetup held by one of my favorite people, Steve Pavlina. Seeing and experiencing both these new parts of my life has led me to realize a couple of things.

1. When I put my mind to something it happens, and quick.

2. Everyone just wants true honest real conversation

For a good period of time now I have been saying exactly what I think, doing what I think, just being what I think. No qualms about any of it. I just go along living in the moment. I embody whatever thoughts I have at that minute. Often completely foregoing previously held ideas or memories. Late one lonely night I came to the realization that all I really wanted was someone to talk with. Someone to really listen, to try and understand me. Someone who could respect my ideas and offer their own ideas and opinions. I held that thought in mind over the course of a couple months. Slowly I changed a few things about my daily life. I would talk more to clerks and random people I came across. I just try to reach out and find what I wanted.

I’ve long since be overly serious, real, and truthful in my online dating life. I always spewed out emails with all my beliefs and ideas. Sharing way more than anyone probably wanted to hear from me. One evening the word “Something” popped out at me in the title of an intelligently written dating ad. I thought, hmm I am something. I wrote out a flowing email response and then I waited. To my surprise I got an equally intelligent email back a few days later. This started a string of what I would like to call “Authentic Communication”. Without knowing much about each other we shared our thoughts, opinions and ideas on everything from work, education, life to movies, sports, music. We basically just had an open chat about anything and everything. This created a fascinating base for discussions and our connection was deep with what seemed little work other than being ourselves. Our instant messaging was mind blowing and once we met IRL it was simple to fall in a pattern of making our reality together, sharing and accepting each other as we are. Maybe I’m over hyping this but I have never in my 33 years had this happen. I am really loving the conversations and sharing. It has made our connection really trusting and close. Something I find us doing a lot is one will say “When you say ____, that makes me feel ____” I read in a book that this really helps to create talking for connection and authentic communication. It feels great.

Now I’m in a really great place in my life and things are going grandly. On a whim Steve Pavlina posts up a men’s group meetup thing. I signed up immediately which is something I would not normally do. I felt nervous about the whole thing as I am mostly a loner. About 20 guys in a room talking seemed a bit intimidating. Without going into tons of detail since the groups are supposed to be confidential, the whole plan is to get guys together to talk authentically and honestly to each other. Just share themselves in front of the group and then offer feedback to each other. Something that guys rarely do in normal friend groups. Now I don’t know if this is just me drawing this stuff into my life or if this is just the vibration of the way the world is going. Really weird how I just wanted someone to talk to and I got the perfect connection shortly after and then after that it just kept coming. Now I’m not sure I like the whole sharing thing with a group of guys that much. Its really hard not to critique and want to give advice to these dudes. Either way its really fascinating that all people really want is authentic communication.

Seems pretty simple. Listen to whats happening in your head. Calmly move yourself to action. Speak from the heart in every thing you do. Live your life from a place of trust, honesty and open minded communication. I feel that if this was the mindset of society all the other problems would fall away without us even noticing. I’m brought back to something in a previous post about the Lenny Kravitz song Believe, he says “Just be Love”

A poem I wrote awhile ago and also posted on my Tumblr as audio.

Reality

I want to feel something real

I want to know my reality

The truth in your eyes

The calm of your words

The depth of your smile

Reflect from deep within me

These things you cannot confirm

I want to feel something real

I want to know your reality

The softness of your breath

The scent of your skin

The touch of your hand

Reflect from deep within you

These things I cannot confirm

Alone we imagine and explore

Together we create and adventure